a weight loss program is inherently for the short term. therefore, even if you do lose weight, when you stop the program the weight will return. if you're overfat (not to be confused with overweight), then of course changes need to be made, but these must be realistic and sustainable changes which you'll be able to keep up for the long term. therefore you will have made lifestyle and behavioural changes which will mean the weight will stay off. (no links please)
You are abosultely correct. You cannot follow a diet only to revert to your previous habits and behaviours.
In my personal experience try to make small and acheivable changes first, which easily allow you to adapt.
Throw out your large dinner plates - use small ones instead. It will leave less room for the extra food forcing you not to over eat. Don't skip breakfast - I know it's become a cliche, but it really the most important meal of the day. It give you metabolism the kisk start it needs. Don't starve yourself - Don't miss a meal as it will throw your body into starvation mode and cause you to possibly overeat at the next meal. Apples - Grab an apple before you head out to the bar at night. It will fill you up and stop you from eating any bar 'snacks'.
Try some of the above instead of yoyo dieting and you'll notice some real improvements.